exploring uncertainty and embrace at your own church

As discussed at length in a previous post, which I highly recommend you read first, uncertain spaces are those which have not clearly articulated if and how they value and embrace diverse people. In contrast, a declared space has clearly articulated if and how it values and embraces diverse people. Uncertainty about a space - especially a church - can be a significant barrier to new people who are looking for a church home. This is of particular interest to churches that want to be more welcoming, especially as much conversation about being welcoming addresses what happens once the newcomer is in the church, rather than the barriers that keep people from entering. (If you have not read the article, I suggest reading it first).

At first thought, it might seem easy to cease being an uncertain space: declare where you are at as an individual or a community in terms of how you value and embrace people.

The process of creating such declarations, along with being a growing experience for the community, can be difficult and potentially divisive at the same time. It will involve conversations and dialogue about where one’s community is actually at and where it wants to be, which is entirely intertwined with where the community’s members are at and where they want to be. And it can result in the discovery that what might have seemed like a fairly homogenous community on the surface, has a lot more diversity when one digs deeper.

This post is intended to be a starting point, a help in exploring where your church is at and where it might want to go. Ideally, work through it with a group so that you can benefit from one another’s insights. Note that this document is a work in progress and may be expanded upon in the future.

[twelve key points about radical exclusivity]

Twelve key points about radical exclusivity from yours truly, written as the opposite of the twelve points of radical inclusivity:

1.
Radical Exclusivity is and must be conservative.

2.
Radical Exclusivity recognizes, values, loves and celebrates the people at the center.

3.
Radical Exclusivity does harm in the name of God.

4.
Radical Exclusivity is intentional and creates ministry at the center.

5.
The primary goal of Radical Exclusivity is to be the one and only true church.

6.
Radical Exclusivity maintains existing ways of seeing and being.

7.
Radical Exclusivity requires ambiguity, control and power.

8.
Radical Exclusivity is based on shame and fear.

9.
Radical Exclusivity ignores and devalues the margin.

10.
Radical Exclusivity must be linked to preaching and teaching.

11.
Radical Exclusivity demands conformity.

12.
Radical Exclusivity is best sustained when the members of the community are kept under control of the leadership.

adapted by rob g

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See also twelve key points about the radical inclusivity model.

[twelve key points about the radical inclusivity model]

Bishop Flunder, author of Where the Edge Gathers: Building a Community of Radical Inclusion, discusses twelve key aspects about the radical inclusivity model in the appendix of her book. Here are the twelve summary statements from these key aspects:

Twelve Steps: The Refuge Radical Inclusivity Model from Bishop Yvette Flunder

1.
Radical Inclusivity is and must be radical.

2.
Radical Inclusivity, recognizes, values, loves and celebrates people on the margin.


3.
Radical Inclusivity recognizes harm done in the name of God.

4.
Radical Inclusivity is intentional and creates ministry on the margin.

5.
The primary goal of Radical Inclusivity is not to imitate or change the mainline church, but rather to be Church.

6.
Radical Inclusivity requires a new way of seeing and a new way of being.

7.
Radical Inclusivity requires awareness, information and understanding.

8.
Radical Inclusivity does not hide and works to undo shame and fear.

9.
Radical Inclusivity recognizes diversity on the margin.

10.
Radical Inclusivity must be linked to preaching and teaching.

11.
Radical Inclusivity demands hospitality.

12.
Radical Inclusivity is best sustained and celebrated when everyone in the community is responsible and accountable.

From Yvette A. Flunder, author of Where the Edge Gathers: Building a Community of Racial Inclusion

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For more information on each point, see the appendix for the book.

[where the edge gathers: building a community of radical inclusion, by yvette a. flunder]

Where the Edge Gathers is quite a remarkable book, which is really no surprise considering that it's written by Bishop Flunder of the City of Refuge United Church of Christ.

"In Where The Edge Gathers, Flunder uses examples of persons most marginalized by church and society to illustrate the use of "village ethics" -- knowing where the boundaries are when all things are exposed--and "village theology" -- giving everyone a seat at the central meeting place or welcome table. Flunder focuses on the following marginalized groups: Same-sex couples, to convey the need to re-examine sexual and relational ethics, Transgendered persons, to illustrate the importance of radical inclusivity, Gay persons living with AIDS, to emphasize the need to de-stigmatize societies view of any group of people."

(source)

Flunder's book is divided into two main parts: the first contains four chapters on community, and the second contains nineteen sermons, given as an example of "one tool that defines, reinforces, and supports the collective theology of the community." I recommend it as an excellent book on the topic.

[peace community church's artistic declaration]

Peace Community Church in Oberlin, Ohio, wants people to know that its doors are open to everyone. As part of this, they have a new mural which clearly states where it is at when it comes to welcoming people regardless of sexual orientation or skin colour.

Painted by Robert Cothran, the five-panel piece shows a rainbow ribbon coming from the left and a racial harmony ribbon coming from the right, to join around a cross in the center panel. I especially like this because the incorporation of the lgbt ribbon with the racial harmony ribbon, which I've never seen before, acknowledges the diversity of people and the fact that people can be part of several minorities at the same time.

Read more about this mural.

Read more about uncertain spaces and what some churches are doing to articulate how they value and embrace diverse people.

transubstantiation, carnivores and divorcees

St. Atkin's makes it pretty clear that they are pro-carnivore (see previous cartoon in this post). Other things are less certain, but of greater significance to this couple. Will they be welcome even though they married each other after divorcing their previous partners? Not that many years ago, the answer would have been no.  In some churches, it still is.

If you're thinking, "Divorced and remarried? Who cares!", then I ask you: "What do you care about? What matters to you?"

What things make it difficult for you to accept someone else?

Who do you find difficult to embrace?

What's stopping you from loving people the way Jesus did?

And for what things have you yourself experienced rejection?

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Read the article on uncertain spaces.

uncertain spaces

introduction

Your colleague tells you that Human Resources wants to see you right away. If you have no idea as to why, there is uncertainty ahead - perhaps combined with some anxiety or fear -- until you find out whether they are going to fire you, promote you to a special project, or just need a form signed.

You are in an uncertain space, even if just for a few moments until you find out what they really want.

Now what if you're new in town, or perhaps what's new is that you've decided you want to be part of a church. You drive by a church in your neighbourhood, and the sign out in front says "Everyone Welcome".

what does that mean - “everyone welcome”?

Did you know that a study done in the U.S. found that three of the top words non-Christians ages 16 to 29 associate with Christians are judgmental, hypocritical and anti-homosexual? (source: unChristian and article)

Which means that there’s a good chance the person driving past your church and wondering about it, is already doubting the truthfulness and reality of the “Everyone Welcome” sign. Add to that any past negative experience they've had with the church or with Christians, and the uncertainty is even stronger.

The church you drive past is most likely an uncertain space. Will it be hostile or indifferent to you? Or will it be welcoming and embracing? Most times you just don't know.

whose names do you not mention?

Whose names are not mentioned in your church? Of whom have you never heard it said, "they are our brothers and sisters?"


Consider this from Brian McLaren:

The vestiges of Imperial Christianity are not always as obvious as this inscription in stone. But they are no less present in most of our churches. Racism, colonialism, exclusivism, elitism, and other members of the hostility family often hide camouflaged in songs and hymns, devotionals and prayers, sermons and Sunday School lessons. And it’s not only what is said that aids and abets hostility: it’s what is left unsaid. For example, I remember preaching in a predominantly Tutsi church in Burundi. After I made an appeal for the Twa people, the nation’s oppressed minority, someone came up to me and said, “The word Twa has never been spoken before in this church. It is as if the Twa didn’t exist. Thank you for reminding us that the Twa are God’s children.” I thought of how many real-world hostilities around the world are similarly protected through avoidance and silence in churches today.

Brian D. McLaren, p.168, in Why did Jesus, Moses, the Buddha, and Mohammed Cross the Road? Christian Identity in a Multi-Faith World

I spoke up at a church meeting a few years ago, and talked about wanting the church to be a place that is welcoming of our gay brothers and sisters in Christ. Later I realized that I had never heard anyone use the expression "our gay brothers and sisters in Christ" at our church, ever. Perhaps that was the first time it was even said there....

Perhaps it reminded some that this isn't an issue to be debated and ideas to be objected to, but that there are real people involved....

 Hopefully, some who never thought about it might begin to consider the breadth and width and depth of God's love and of the body of Christ.

words you can't say in church

How do you understand Pastor Stickman's silence?

Is he silent because not even he is allowed to say these words?

Or is it because he believes that all words, all topics are open for discussion, and thus there is nothing for him to list?

[rachel held evans on lgbt christians]

Speaking at the GCN conference in 2014, Rachel Held Evans had this to say:

august field trip to a church in London

I arrived about ten minutes late to find the door locked, not a great surprise considering the east-end-of-downtown location of the church and that it was evening, and rang the bell. A moment later, a friendly black woman wearing a colourful tie-dye shirt opened the door, introduced herself as Veronica, and welcomed me in.

She led me into the sanctuary - the rented space seats at least 400 just on the main floor, and there were only about fifty people present. I took a seat and discovered I had arrived just in time for the start of the sermon. Bruce, the pastor, was articulate, friendly and engaging. The service went on from there, not that different from what I experienced growing up Baptist and then attending Anglican churches as an adult. Prayer, Bible readings, hymns and contemporary songs (all familiar to me), sermon, communion, announcements. Across the board, the content was as evangelical as it gets.

In fact, if someone showed you a videotape of the service, leaving out announcements and a few identifying details, you might reasonably think this was any one of the many evangelical churches across our country. In reality, it's the London congregation of the Metropolitan Community Church,  a denomination that had its "origins serving gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered people" and which has now "become an inclusive and affirming congregation that actively welcomes all people".

Dare I suggest that this church is more evangelical - more full of good news - than evangelical usually gets?

In many churches, there are limits as to who is embraced, barriers keeping some out, conditions one has to meet, beliefs people have to agree with to take part. Here, everyone is welcome, all are embraced, the doors are flung wide open. That's good news! And here, in line with Jesus' model of going to those at the margins of his society, this church is about those at the margin of society - and everyone else - being welcomed and embraced.

The service itself was anti-climactic. It didn't have the showiness of seeker churches, the cool of hipster services, or the fervor of an old-fashioned tent revival. Sorry to break it to you, but it wasn't fabulously gay either. Embrace of all of God's creation with a focus on Jesus doesn't make for an exciting church; it makes for a local body of Christ where "come as you are" is real rather than a trite saying, where "just as I am" applies to everyone, where our common need for Jesus' love and God's mercy levels the ground beneath us, where we meet together to praise God and together learn what it means to be apprentices of Jesus.

One thing did stand out about the service, something that in my years of church life I've not seen before. During communion, after the priest or helper gave the bread and wine to the parishioner, they also gave a blessing. Not a simple "Lord bless you and keep you" or similar phrase and then on to the next person. Instead, they put their arms around each and every parishioner and said a prayer of blessing, different for each person.

Seeing this, and as it came closer to my turn to receive communion, I wondered if I as an outsider would also be given a blessing. I was, and part of it included these words: "May the love you experience here travel with you wherever you go."

Amen.

how much to talk about *that* from the pulpit

Q.
A friend of mine told me that he sometimes debates about how much to talk about lgbt matters from the pulpit, or if it is just better to talk about love and inclusion in general.

Here are some thoughts I have in response to that question:

1.
First, there are times when for the sake of the Gospel and for the love of those whom God has made, it is necessary to take a stand and to speak up. This is especially the case when men, women and children who are made by God and loved by Him are being treated unjustly or as less than human. That doesn't mean that this is always the time or the topic; just that there are times and topics that one must speak about. It does mean that trying to be "neutral" helps the oppressor, not the victim, and in the Bible we regularly see God on the side of the victim.

See related post on this blog.


2.
Secondly, in talking about Jesus and his interaction with others, I think it is easy for those of us who are western Christians to be generally pleased with all of that, but none of it threatens our comfort zone, the status quo today, or the privileged status of the many of us who are privileged. The things that the religious people of Jesus' day hated -- him spending time with Samaritans, women, lepers, prostitutes, and so on. -- are not relevant to us. Samaritans seem like another denomination, lepers are few and far away, etc. Somehow one needs to help people see the connection between Jesus and the marginalized persons of his day, and us and the marginalized persons of our time (the people that typically are despised and hated by the religious today).

3.
Third, especially in congregations where the parishioners are privileged, I would consider: how do I help us as a body, see the greater body that we are part of, and the systemic injustice that is around us which is affecting my brothers and sisters  (even if it is not affecting me in obvious or direct ways), Are we part of the community of creation, or a little religious club?

4.
Fourthly, I would speak up and acknowledge our brothers and sisters. It is critical to break the silence and to stop the violence of dehumanizing and subhumanizing others. No more pretending that some do not exist. No more shaming. No more contributing to shame by refusing to acknowledge men, women and children whom God has made and whom He dearly loves. No more obliging people to hide, lie or "fit in" to be accepted and loved.

I remember being at a somewhat volatile church meeting which was discussing a decision (at a regional denominational level) to allow same-sex blessings. I stood up and in my comments, I referred to our gay and lesbian brothers and sisters in Christ. And at the moment of saying these words, the thought came into my mind: no one has ever said this phrase aloud before in this congregation...

And that's a reason to speak about LGBT people -- not LGBT issues but PEOPLE -- from the pulpit. To acknowledge their existence and humanity.

5.
Fifth, understand that as local congregations, we need our gay and lesbian brothers and sisters in Christ.

I'm going to say that again. The local church that you and I participate in, needs our gay and lesbian brothers and sisters in Christ. Without them, we are incomplete. The body of Christ is all of God's children. We can't pick and choose who is in and who is out. Jesus showed us this by his life of embrace, and by giving his life for all. The eye cannot say to the hand, I don't need you. Similarly, straight followers of Jesus cannot say to followers who are LGBT, we don't need you. And if we are ashamed of them, then we need to treat them with even more honour.

6.
Sixth, people don't know where you stand unless you say. If they themselves are lgbtqi, they won't know if they are welcome. They won't know if they are, to use Jeff Chu's words, "desperately and fiercely wanted". Or if it would be better to just leave now and find a better place to be part of. Those who have lgbtqi friends and relatives won't know if they can bring their friend or loved one to church, or if they can speak with you about their life together. Some will not know and others will assume wrongly, and both of these can be barriers to personal growth and community. This can also result in deadly consequences when someone who might have turned to a friend, family member of pastor for help doesn't because they do not know if they will be embraced or rejected.


R.
What are your thoughts on this? What else should be on this list? I'd love to hear your comments.

rob goetze, may 2015

jesus goes to church

Jesus tries to go to church and, instead, gets directions to the least of these. How perfect is that!

looking for love in all the wrong places

When it is said about someone that they are "looking for love in all the wrong places", the reference is usually to places like bars and clubs, or the arms of other people who are considered unsuitable. And implied by the phrase, is that there are "right places" to look for love. Yet I don't recall ever having heard discussions or presentations about the "right places", except perhaps in an ultra-spiritualized way.

The right places to look for love. Ironically, one both expects - and doesn't expect -  a church to be a place to find love. We expect it because we know it should be that way. We don't expect it because we know it often isn't that way.

And so, for Jonesy and others, the church might well be the wrong place to look for love. Pretty sad, I'd say.

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Check out an earlier related post.

ideological colonization

His Holiness Pope Francis, speaking in the Philippines last week (January 2015), expressed concerns about ideological colonization. The Associated Press reports:

Speaking about the regulation of family size, the pope said:

African bishops, in particular, have long complained about how progressive, Western ideas about birth control and gay rights are increasingly being imposed on the developing world by groups, institutions or individual nations, often as a condition for development aid.

"Every people deserves to conserve its identity without being ideologically colonized," Francis said.

"... When imposed conditions come from imperial colonizers, they search to make people lose their own identity and make a sameness," he said. "This is ideological colonization."

GLAAD also reports:

Pope Francis came out with his strongest comments against marriage equality, calling it, "ideological colonization that we have to be careful about that is trying to destroy the family."

Ironically, the Roman Catholic Church and other denominations has been engaging in ideological colonization for years, ever since they first sent missionaries out.

Oops. Of course, we don't call it ideological colonization, but evangelism, spreading the gospel, reaching the lost. Which reminds me of how easy it is to consider something good when I do it, but bad when others do it.

Take, for example, how the Unites States provides funding, training and weapons to "freedom fighters" in some countries, while at the same time fighting against terrorism in other parts of the world. The difference between freedom fighters and terrorists? Some would say it's only a few letters and a matter of perspective.

"Every people deserves to conserve its identity without being ideologically colonized"

Think about this statement. If we take Pope Francis' words seriously and put aside contradictory actions, what might this mean in our relationships with others, both individually and corporately? How can we interact with others in ways that are full of humility and mutuality?

[the table I long for...]

"The Table I long for, the Church I long for, is one where all are not just welcome but desperately & fiercely wanted." @jeffchu #GCNConf
— Rachel Held Evans (@rachelheldevans) January 9, 2015

Yes and yes!

Here are Jeff Chu's other comments on the table he longs for and the church he hopes for:

The table I long for, the church I hope for, is a place where we let others see where the spirit meets the wound, and we help heal those wounds.

The table I long for and the church I hope for has the grace of the gospel as its magnificent centerpiece. 

The table I long for and the church I hope for is where we care more about our companions than about winning our arguments with them, where we set aside the condescension that accompanies our notion that we need to bring them our truth.

The table I long for and the church I hope for has each of you sitting around it, struggling to hold the knowledge that you, vulnerable you and courageous you, are beloved by God, not just welcome but desperately and fiercely wanted.

The table I long for and the church I hope for is made of rough-hewn humility, nailed together by a jesus who has given us this ridiculous freedom to be wrong and yet still be made right.

The table I hope for and the church I long for is a place where we love especially when it isn't easy, allowing us to be vulnerable, inviting every voice to join the conversation, pushing us meal by meal towards community, towards communion.

Can we build that kind of table? Can we be that kind of church? I think so. And at that table, we're going to eat family style.

Watch Jeff Chu's entire talk from the GCN Conference (he starts at about the 45 minute mark).
Read Jeff Chu's talk online at his website.

[embedded]

Richard Beck on the kingdom:

'The eccentric Kingdom doesn't claim territory over against the world. The eccentric Kingdom doesn't erect walls to create a gated community. Rather, the eccentric Kingdom, like salt and leaven, is embedded in the world.

The eccentric Kingdom is the embedded, pilgrim, landless, possessionless, homeless, sojourning, itinerant missionary community called and commissioned to live lives of radical service and availability to the world.'

Isn't that quote just delicious?! And I wonder, why is such fare so rarely found?

Read the whole post.

[ending the teaching of contempt against the church’s sexual minorities]

Dr. David P. Gushee, a leading evangelical ethicist, has just given an incredible talk at the Reformation Project's Regional Training Conference.

Entitled “Ending the Teaching of Contempt against the Church’s Sexual Minorities”, it is a must-read.


In the talk, he addresses the

unchristlike body of Christian tradition,

amounting to what can be fairly described as a teaching of contempt against one particular group, which was prevalent in the church for centuries until the mid 1900's, and then compares that to a similar teaching of contempt has been directed against another group in more recent years.

Read Dr. Gushee's talk. This is a must-read if you are a Christian serious about your faith.

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Related:
My cartoon about Martin Luther
My cartoon about who is ostracized

cruci-fix

Having problems with too many undesirable people coming to your church?

Here's a great solution:

If you haven't heard, there's been some controversy over "anti-homeless spikes" appearing in various places -- outside a record store in London England, in an apartment entry in Montreal, and more. While supposedly intended to stop loitering or to reduce anti-social behaviour, they result in reducing the places where homeless people can find "shelter" at night.

After some outcry, including the mayor of Montreal insisting they be removed as that is not the image he wants for Montreal, most spikes were removed. The bigger question, asked by Matthew Pearce of Montreal's Old Brewery Mission, is: what is really going to be done for the homeless? Do we just want to look like we're not mean to the homeless, or are we going to do something positive and effective?

But seriously, what I'm asking here is: in what ways are the behaviours and attitudes of Christians functioning like the spikes? Functioning in such a way that when people see a building with a cross on it, they feel unwelcome, unwanted, judged and rejected?

why god doesn't go to church

Instead, God is in the thin places, the liminal places, the margins, the bars and bath houses, the back alleys, the streets of the city....



p.s. thanks c.r. for leaving room for god.