more beauty...

 I recently attended a webinar by Egale Canada, the first of their series to increase the understanding of anti-racism, Indigenization and faith in Canada from a 2SLGBTQI context. It was very well done, with four speakers (re)introducing the Black feminist concept of intersectionality, exploring its implications, and affirming its relevance to 2SLGBTQI organizations.

As a person of faith myself, I really appreciated the important discussion, being quite aware from real life of the tensions and antagonism that can be present between queer folx and religious communities.

I also saw the following post come across my social media feed recently, and was stunned speechless.

When I first read it, I stared at my phone screen, not even having thoughts of any sort, but just looking at the words, letting them float into my brain. To be honest, on their way to my brain, the words affected my eyes which got a bit teary…

“There is more beauty in a single trans child than in the whole of your theology.”

It can also be said, “There is more beauty in a single non-binary child… more beauty in a single intersex child… more beauty in a single queer child…  than in the whole of your theology.”

And I'll add this: 

“There is more beauty in YOU as a queer person than in the whole of anyone’s -ologies. The universe leaps for joy because of you.”

Related links:

Building Bridges page at https://egale.ca/awareness/buildingbridges/

Post from https://www.instagram.com/p/C3lZ3QNuWVe/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link&igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==

my alphabet includes NB, T and Q…

I’d like to share with you today about my alphabet of love and, in particular, about why it includes four letters that I've come to love very much: N, B, T and Q.  

Non-binary, transgender and queer.  

I'm focusing on these four letters because I have some amazing, beautiful friends and colleagues who are non-binary, trans and queer. 

And because I've been learning to center people who are at the margins, those who are more oppressed by the structures of our society and by those in power. To figure out how the last can be first…

And because it seems that some people are actively and consciously choosing to leave the letters NB, T and Q out of their alphabet, and I think it is important to speak up about it.

Of course we know some people are against trans folx because of lies and misinformation they've been told by others for political gain or religious control.

But there are also members of the LGBTQ2S+ community who say things like “LGB without the T”. The distinction they are making is between themselves as people who have a minority sexual orientation - lesbian, gay, bisexual - and other people who have a minority gender identity and/or expression - trans, non-binary, queer.

I am sad when I hear this. It’s true that from a western perspective, sexual orientation and gender identity are usually considered to be two different things. But when those who are LGB want to advocate for themselves and leave out the T - and by extension, the NB, I'm not okay with that. 

At a practical level, this wrongly suggests that the two groups never overlap - that lesbian, gay and bisexual people are always cisgender and that transgender people are never lesbian, gay or bisexual. This is not the case.

It also wrongly suggests that what impacts transgender folx will not impact lesbian, gay and bisexual people. That's not the case either and ignores the reality that what's happening politically is not really about protecting trans kids but is about control and power, and LGB may be next… 

And finally, it leaves out queer people whose cultures - or queerness, for that matter - do not have the same distinction between sex and gender that is predominant in western culture.

[transgender day of remembrance]

I did not know any of the transgender people whose lives were lost in 2023, either violently by others or by suicide due to ongoing violence against them, but I do know that my trans colleagues are beautiful and amazing people and so along with mourning those lost, I take action for the flourishing of those who are with us.

Please see the following site for more information on this important day and to understand more about it:

https://tdor.translivesmatter.info/

This video, based true events, shows a profoundly beautiful life cut short by hatred and violence:

Watch on YouTube: Short Life Stories | White Ribbon - YouTube

(almost) everyone has pronouns in their signature... and nowhere else

In many larger organizations these days, almost everyone includes their pronouns in their email signature except, of course, those who ("against the rules") do not even have an email signature! 

But aside from that, I've noticed that almost no one ever mentions pronouns. A few do list them with their videoconferencing "name", but not too many. But for when introducing oneself at regular meetings, I never hear anyone say things like, "I'm Rob. My pronouns are he/him/they. I'm a communications specialist..." The exception to this, logically, is events and webinars related to diversity and inclusion, where the presenters frequently include their pronouns and invite attendees to share a bit about themselves, including pronouns if they wish, in the chat.

Here is my broad perspective on this: Once an organization allows pronouns in the email signature, most people will add them. Some will be keen on doing so, others will add them because it's somewhat expected. But that's where it ends. 

"One and done."

[trans and nonbinary people are just people like you and me ...]

In light of a lot of misinformation going around about trans and non-binary people, I thought I'd share a few key articles providing balanced perspectives. For the first one, I've also extracted the "quick read" section: 

Quick Read Trans and nonbinary people are just people

•   "Anti-trans legislation is largely based on misinformation and myths.  
•     Kids know their gender identity as early as 3. 
•     Gender-affirming care does not typically involve surgery under age 18. 
•     Being trans or nonbinary is not “trendy,” and most people who transition will not detransition.  
•     Anti-trans sports bans are not based on scientific research.  
•     Sex is not a binary and being trans is not a mental illness.  
•     Trans and nonbinary people have a right to live and access necessary gender-affirming medical care."

From the article "Debunking 8 Top Myths About Trans and Nonbinary People" - read the rest at: https://rightasrain.uwmedicine.org/life/relationships/transgender-nonbinary-myths

Related articles:

Detransition, Desistance, and Disinformation: A Guide for Understanding Transgender Children Debates

https://juliaserano.medium.com/detransition-desistance-and-disinformation-a-guide-for-understanding-transgender-children-993b7342946e

Arkansas Trans Ban Unconstitutional: Judge Declares 311 Statements Of Fact In Ruling

https://www.erininthemorning.com/p/arkansas-trans-ban-unconstitutional

[pastoral blessing for trans and non-binary parishioners]

In June 2023, at their General Synod, 

"The Anglican Church of Canada has approved the use of new pastoral liturgical texts that fully embrace transgender and gender non-binary people in its church. 

The text, which is wording that would be used during a worship service across all Anglican parishes, includes blessings for the gender transition process, affirmation of gender identity, along with scripture readings and appropriate hymns." (from CBC)

 

Here's a key phrase that stood out for me:

"I think that the rise in fear and hatred and violence against gender queer people has galvanized the Anglican Church of Canada [and] its leadership, and we want to be doing more than you know statements against homophobia, statements against transphobia," said [Rev. Eileen] Scully.

Anyone can make statements - but statements do not usually make the world a better place for minoritized people, so I'm delighted to see this positive and real step forward to increasing the inclusion of transgender and non-binary parishioners!

---

The new "Pastoral Liturgies for Journeys of Gender Affirmation and Transition" can be found at https://www.anglicanlutheran.ca/wp-content/uploads/6e-Report-008-%E2%80%93-Appendix-E-Pastoral-Liturgies-Gender-Transition.pdf

Source of quotes: https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/kitchener-waterloo/anglican-church-of-canada-introduces-pastoral-blessing-for-transgender-and-gender-non-binary-parishioners-1.6899973#

[standing with you...]

 

International Day against Homophobia, Transphobia and Biphobia

Amazing graphic courtesy of may17.org

(6 versions available at may17.org)

Along with being about people and advocacy which I affirm and work for, these posters are absolutely gorgeous and I love the way they have incorporated different races, body types and abilities in the midst of the IDAHOBIT theme… 

"universal" washroom

A joke:

Question: What do you call a non-binary deer?

Answer: Dear.

---

Here's a cool version of a washroom sign at the Husky/Tim Horton's in Canmore. Very thematically appropriate as you'll know if you've ever been in Canmore or looked it up on a map.

One thing that's missing, despite its claim to be "universal", is that it still presumes two genders, as seen by the standard figure with pants with a buck's head and the standard figure with a skirt with the female deer head. 

What to put instead? 

How about a toilet? With a wheelchair to indicate barrier-free, and an image of a change table... Maybe the words "Restroom" or "Toilet"

Nowhere near as fun as antlers, I must say...

But going deeper, the problem with this sign is that it is conventionally unconventional - it is still cisheteronormative regardless of cute imagery. It is based on the foundation that presumes everyone is cisgender and heterosexual. 

And that's simply not true and not inclusive of all of God's creation.

mr mike's "he she" hallway

Saw this at the Mr. Mike's restaurant in North Edmonton - an open hallway with multiple doors, each with moustache and lips (some also with wheelchair and baby logos).

Not perfect, as the signs are still based on a gender binary, but pretty good.

It provides the second best alternative to truly gender-neutral washrooms: single-user washrooms with dual gender signage. This means that transgender and non-binary patrons can go into any available washroom without anyone hassling them for being "in the wrong washroom" No one will hassle them for what door they go through, and no one will hassle them for which washroom they are actually in (cuz they'll be in there by themselves).

I imagine that Mr. Mike's interior designers were going for cute and having the signage here align with the signage elsewhere in the restaurant. However, with a bit more creativity, they probably could have come up with all-gender signage that was still on brand!

What do you think? What kind of design would clearly indicate that these are washrooms, while still having a fun element?

land and water, only!

You may have heard the saying that there are two kinds of people in the world—

those who divide people into two kinds,

 and those who don’t...

We love categorizing things, especially into opposites: land and sea, sun and moon, day and night, light and dark, male and female. And it's easy to read a passage in the Bible and assume that this is how things are. For example, that when God made humankind and it says, "male and female he created them", that this is all there is. There are men and there are women.

Let's step back and take a look at some earlier verses in Genesis 1:

 And God said, “Let the water under the sky be gathered to one place, and let dry ground appear.” And it was so. God called the dry ground “land,” and the gathered waters he called “seas.” And God saw that it was good. (Genesis 1:9-10 NIV)

God took one thing (the water under the sky) and divided it into two things. Land. Seas. That's all there is.

But that's not all there is. Land meets sea and sea meets land, and where they do, there are things like marshes, which are not land and not sea. Oh, oh. They are in between, sort of land and sort of water. They don't fit the creation story. Are they bad? Evil? The result of the fall? Or a natural part of God's creation? And what about swamps and bogs?

marshes and transgender folx

 

This cartoon will make more sense to you if you read my other post.

I want to focus on one key part of what God says above: "... that people would take everything so literally and unkindly..." 

Why do we take things so literally and unkindly? Why do we default to suspicion over grace, to being right over relationship, to not giving the benefit of the doubt?

Isn't this the opposite of grace, the opposite of Jesus?

[Happy International Women's Day!]

 

Celebrating International Women's Day and all women, transgender and cisgender -  recognizing also that there are some who present as women and have similar experiences to women but are non-binary.

Picture is of a Hershey chocolate bar with packaging specifically for this month: "Her for She". Featuring Fae Johnstone of Wisdom 2 Action. Art by @gosiakomorski 

Picture is of a Hershey chocolate bar with packaging specifically for this month: "Her for She". Featuring Autumn Peltier. Art by @gosiakomorski 

[supporting Black lgbgtq+ communities - resources]

Coming Out: Living Authentically as Black LGBTQ People

For those who identify as Black LGBTQ people, the coming out process can be complex to navigate. Coming Out: Living Authentically as Black LGBTQ People is designed for those embarking on their own coming out journey at the intersections of LGBTQ and Black identities. This guide aims to recognize the unique experiences Black LGBTQ people have in coming out, while understanding that coming out is a personal choice and the lifelong coming out experience is different for everyone.

Download page for this 68-page guide: https://www.hrc.org/resources/coming-out-living-authentically-as-black-lgbtq-people

---

Black & LGBTQ: Approaching Intersectional Conversations

If you’re considering engaging (as a Black queer person) with people who identify as non-Black in your life about your identities, it’s important to remember that the process of having difficult conversations does not begin or end with the discussion itself. It is essential to consider your well-being and safety at each step in the journey. Here are some approaches to consider before, during, and after a difficult conversation to make sure the dialogue — and your mental health — stays safe.

Direct download: https://www.thetrevorproject.org/wp-content/uploads/2021/07/intersectional-conversations-1.pdf

[Alok on "the grammar of gender"]

I follow Alok Vaid-Menon on Instagram. They are an author, speaker, poet, comedian...and I've been learning so much from them.

Here they are speaking about the grammar of gender:

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by ALOK (@alokvmenon)

Visit Alok's Instagram page for more great content.

how to invite and make space for the sharing of personal pronouns

Individually

There are various steps individuals who are comfortable with sharing their pronouns can do to invite and make space for others to also share their pronouns if they wish. Here are a few examples:

1. Share your pronouns first. This lets others know that sharing of pronouns is okay, and models one way of sharing them.


2. When asking people to introduce themselves (at a meeting, for example), invite them to share pronouns by saying something like “Introduce yourself with your name, your role on this project, your pronouns if you like, and what you hope to accomplish in today’s meeting.”
   Note: extend this invitation equally to everyone. Do not single out the people that you think look gender-diverse.


3. Share your pronouns in your email signature and with your screen name on video conferencing services.


4. When meeting someone new in a work or formal context, use this three-part introduction: Name, Pronouns, Job Position. This models the sharing of pronouns and sets an example for how the other person could share, yet leaves it open for them to just share Name and Job Position. Note that having three parts to your own introduction, means that someone who prefers not to share their pronouns still has two items to share, which is less awkward than only saying their name.


5. If attending an event where name tags are provided, adding your pronouns after your name is an easy way to normalize the sharing of pronouns.

why sharing personal pronouns must be optional

 

Sharing of pronouns is increasing as diversity and inclusion awareness and initiatives grow. It is far more common to see pronouns listed in email signatures or beside attendee names during a video conference. 

More organizations are promoting the use and sharing of pronouns. Some organizations, however, are now requiring employees to share their pronouns. This is problematic and not recommended for a number of reasons:

1. Someone who is not sure about their pronouns can be pushed into making a premature choice simply to comply with the requirement to list their pronouns, and then may face additional scrutiny if they later change their pronouns upon further consideration.


2. Some transgender or non-binary folx might be quite sure about their pronouns but might not be ready to share them. Perhaps they are still getting used to their identity themselves, perhaps it’s not safe to be out at work, perhaps they have other reasons. If they are required to list their pronouns when they do not want to, there are really only two options: lie about their pronouns by listing ones that are not true to them and possibly feeling like they have negated their transition, or tell the truth and out themselves before they are ready to. Neither option is ideal.


3. Someone might not want to share their pronouns as past experience has taught them that it’s not safe to do so.


4. Some people might not be familiar with sharing pronouns, and might not know what to do or be concerned about not doing it wrong, especially if put on the spot in person or at a meeting.


5. Someone might be comfortable sharing their pronouns and identity in some contexts and not in others. For example, someone might be fine sharing with close friends and with colleagues in their work group, but prefer not to do so with acquaintances and strangers. Depending how much their role needs to interact with others outside of the work group, being obliged to share their pronouns might be uncomfortable and awkward for them. For example, a non-binary employee might have asked their friends to use “they/them” to refer to them, but when interacting with the public at work, the employee uses “she/her” as it matches what customers expect and is easier.


6. Some cisgender people do not like pronouns or see the point of them, or do not like trans folx. Requiring these persons to use pronouns can result in a backlash, one that will often be directed back at trans people.

While pronouns sharing should never be required, it should most definitely be allowed and facilitated, especially as it can make a world of difference to people who are trans or gender non conforming, along with being helpful when connecting with people whose names are gender neutral or unfamiliar. 

by Rob Goetze

To learn more, watch my 36 minute video on "A Practical Guide to the New World of Pronouns" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BdtVLgU6OxA&t=6s

[resource: queers the word: a 40-day devotional for lgbtq+ christians]

 

"Have you ever wanted a daily devotional but couldn’t find one that affirmed your sexuality/gender identity? or took social justice seriously? Do you want something you can do in five minutes in the morning or can use for an extended time of study? Are you looking for a devotional that takes Scripture seriously, but also affirms the goodness of queer and trans people?

In this 40-day devotional you’ll find entries from a queer and trans perspective written to support you in strengthening your faith and affirming your identity." (from website)

For more information and purchasing (paperback, kindle and digital pdf), see 
https://www.queertheology.com/devotional/

[strands for trans]

 Here is an amazing resource for transgender folx: Strands for Trans. As they put it:

A HISTORY OF REJECTION

Haircuts are historically gendered: Salons for women. Barbershops for men. This leaves the trans community feeling uncomfortable, unwelcome and unsure.

A FUTURE OF ACCEPTANCE

Strands For Trans is bringing gays, straights, women, men, anyone, together to create more trans-friendly barbershops and hair salons. Join in and let’s help this community feel welcome.

This great site includes videos of people sharing of why this matters and asks people to support the site by approaching their own barbershops or hair salons, as well as through social media. The site also invites shop owners to request a sticker and add their businesses to the map. 

And the map shows 6,000+ listings of trans-friendly salons and barber shops, mostly in the US and Canada but also in other countries. Zoom in to your city, find a marker in your neighbourhood, and click to get details!

https://www.strandsfortrans.com/

Snip of map from Strands For Trans site, showing parts of BC and Alberta. Trans-coloured markers are located at Edmonton, Lethbridge, Kelowna, Vancouver and other cities.

[transforming - book]

I'm currently reading this book, the first one I've read by a trans author and the first that's about the Bible and the lives of transgender Christians. It's especially interesting in light of a recent panel that I attended on "Being Transgender in the workplace".

Love the book so far! Keep your eyes open for future posts inspired by this...

Find out more at http://austenhartke.com/book or get a copy from your local bookshop or library.

Austen's site also includes a lengthy resources page and a link to Transmission Ministry Collective:

"We’re an online community of transgender and gender-expansive Christians committed to growing our faith, supporting each other, and healing the world."

The Transmission Ministry Collective offers:

• text-based chat servers
• video-based support groups
• online Bible study
• workshops
• extensive resources

[affirmation guide for trans & gender-expansive identities]

Affirmation Guide for Trans & Gender-Expansive Identities, plus Trans & Gender-Expansive Identities eCourse

"Q Christian’s second Affirmation Guide features Taj Smith. This guide is designed to counter the idea that transgender and gender-expansive people cannot be Christians. This guide is also meant to support anyone who is and/or loves someone who is transgender. Taj dives into the Scriptural, theological, and relational affirmation of trans people in this foundational resource. Video content for the guide can be found below." (from webpage)

The guide is free though a donation is requested from those who are able. The page also features five videos that relate to content in the guide:

• Introduction
• Scriptural and Theological Affirmation
• Life in Community
• Resources
• Conclusion

 https://www.qchristian.org/guides/trans