marshes and transgender folx

 

This cartoon will make more sense to you if you read my other post.

I want to focus on one key part of what God says above: "... that people would take everything so literally and unkindly..." 

Why do we take things so literally and unkindly? Why do we default to suspicion over grace, to being right over relationship, to not giving the benefit of the doubt?

Isn't this the opposite of grace, the opposite of Jesus?

strategically inclusive leadership #3: the table I long for....

[core topic]

This is part of an ongoing series 
on strategically inclusive leadership. 
Read the introduction here.

You may be familiar with some sayings about "if they don't give you a seat at the table… then _______”. For example: “If they don’t give you a seat at the table, bring your own chair.” or “If they don’t give you a seat at the table, build your own table."

In the context of such sayings, “table” is usually the conference table, the executive decision-making table. 

I'd like to share a quote with you from Jeff Chu. Jeff is Chinese American, a journalist and author of Does Jesus Really Love Me? A Gay Christian’s Pilgrimage in Search of God in America. Here’s what he said:

"The Table I long for...

is one where all are not just welcome

but desperately & fiercely wanted."

Isn’t that amazing? Wouldn’t that be the table to beat all tables?

reflect

Before we look at this in the context of strategically inclusive leadership, let's take a moment to reflect by ourselves. We won’t be asking anyone to share, or to draw pictures of what you thought about, or any of that. Let’s just close our eyes, slow down our breathing, and reflect: are there or have there been times and places where I am desperately and fiercely wanted? 

(Pause again to let people reflect)

That’s the personal backdrop… 

While Jeff  said this in the context of the communion table in his faith tradition, you as the leadership of a community organization or ERG could explore what this might look like by thinking of "the table" as your organization or ERG. 

[Happy International Women's Day!]

 

Celebrating International Women's Day and all women, transgender and cisgender -  recognizing also that there are some who present as women and have similar experiences to women but are non-binary.

Picture is of a Hershey chocolate bar with packaging specifically for this month: "Her for She". Featuring Fae Johnstone of Wisdom 2 Action. Art by @gosiakomorski 

Picture is of a Hershey chocolate bar with packaging specifically for this month: "Her for She". Featuring Autumn Peltier. Art by @gosiakomorski 

sil #2: Indigenizing the academy (part 2: exercises)

[core topic]

This is part of an ongoing series 
on strategically inclusive leadership. 
Read the introduction here.

The purpose of this exercise is to explore the ideas presented in part 1 of Indigenization of the Academy in the context of your organization. The exercise presumes a larger organization at which you are part of a smaller part. For example, the following types of situations:

• A company or institution where you are involved in an Employee Resource Group
• A religious institution or faith community where you provide leadership in one particular location or sub-community
• A municipality where you are involved in a community association or cultural organization

getting practical with your team

part 1 - what the broader level is currently doing 

Draw the following chart on a whiteboard or large chart.

	Things our company / institution / organization /government currently does that matches each of the three categories:
Denial, status quo, continuing, etc.
Helping minoritized and racialized employees succeed in existing structure
Transforming the organization and building a new one together
Other thoughts and ideas

As a group, use sticky notes or just write down what your larger organization -- the company, government, etc. for which you work, is doing that matches each of the three categories on the left.. Additional thoughts which do not fit the three main categories can be put in the lower row.

[supporting Black lgbgtq+ communities - resources]

Coming Out: Living Authentically as Black LGBTQ People

For those who identify as Black LGBTQ people, the coming out process can be complex to navigate. Coming Out: Living Authentically as Black LGBTQ People is designed for those embarking on their own coming out journey at the intersections of LGBTQ and Black identities. This guide aims to recognize the unique experiences Black LGBTQ people have in coming out, while understanding that coming out is a personal choice and the lifelong coming out experience is different for everyone.

Download page for this 68-page guide: https://www.hrc.org/resources/coming-out-living-authentically-as-black-lgbtq-people

---

Black & LGBTQ: Approaching Intersectional Conversations

If you’re considering engaging (as a Black queer person) with people who identify as non-Black in your life about your identities, it’s important to remember that the process of having difficult conversations does not begin or end with the discussion itself. It is essential to consider your well-being and safety at each step in the journey. Here are some approaches to consider before, during, and after a difficult conversation to make sure the dialogue — and your mental health — stays safe.

Direct download: https://www.thetrevorproject.org/wp-content/uploads/2021/07/intersectional-conversations-1.pdf

[braves wear braids documentary]

 If you are a TEACHER, this is a must-watch video!

Direct link to video

The Braves Wear Braids documentary looks at the spiritual meaning of braids, and the struggles faced by Indigenous youth to keep this important piece of the culture alive through interviews with Ethan Bear, Elders, and other Indigenous men who speak to their own personal experiences with their braids. (from video description)

So... hopefully by now most of us know not to touch other people's hair! Much of what I've seen on that topic has been about Black people having their hair touched by strangers. 

While of course I wasn't going around touching anyone's hair, this video gave me a better understanding of the important role of hair in Indigenous culture. Note the important role that parents, along with teachers and principals, have in educating others and in addressing and preventing bullying, in the context of Indigenous male youth with long hair and braids.

sil #2: Indigenizing the academy (part 1: concepts)

[core topic]

This is part of an ongoing series 
on strategically inclusive leadership. 
Read the introduction here.

Before COVID, I went to MacEwan University on several different occasions to attend seminars and symposia. Outside, they fly the Treaty 6 flag. On the way in, I noted that each entrance has a land acknowledgement posted in both English and Cree, on a formal plaque.

There is a wonderful Indigenous Student Center with several staff, a resident Elder, cultural ceremonies, tutoring and other educational supports. There are introductory Indigenous awareness courses.

Allard Hall, the university's new Arts and Culture Building, has an atrium named after Elder Jerry Woods, who served as an elder for MacEwan and other institutions for many years. A display on the second level of the atrium commemorates him and his legacy at the school. It has a plaque with his picture and a statement in the middle, with a picture on one side and a framed ribbon shirt on the other. MacEwan also commissioned Christi Belcourt and Isaac Murdoch to create a mural for the university.

Today, these kinds of things tend to be fairly common for many post-secondary educational institutions in Canada. Thirty years ago, were educational institutions doing anything of the sort that I shared about MacEwan?

Not in the slightest…

The foundation of education institutions here in Canada, whether at an elementary or high school level or post secondary, is a Western colonial cisgender heterosexual patriarchal one. Did I miss anything in that description? This includes a denial of what happened to indigenous peoples in Indian Residential Schools, and an insistence on conformity to the dominant culture. This education acts as if Indigenous people were from long long ago and ignores their present reality.

We are going to look at some important concepts  of indigenization and the academy related to the above example. Then we will see how these concepts could apply in a roughly parallel way to other organizations and businesses. Finally, a few comments on what we as strategically inclusive leaders can - and cannot - readily do about this, as people involved in ERGs or community organizations.

my thoughts on "‘radical inclusion’ for L.G.B.T. people, women and others in the Catholic Church" by Cardinal McElroy

On January 24, 2023, an article titled Cardinal McElroy on ‘radical inclusion’ for L.G.B.T. people, women and others in the Catholic Church, written by Cardinal Robert W. McElroy, was posted at America Magazine. I am sharing some key quotes from that article here, along with the link, for two reasons:

1. Cardinal McElroy speaks frankly about the topic of radical inclusion in regard to the Roman Catholic Church, including references to patterns of racism or how church marginalizes victims of clergy sexual abuse.
2. The quotes and surrounding text resonate with some of the themes that are a key part of my thinking these days, particularly related to strategically inclusive leadership.

The five quotes and some brief comments by me (I encourage you to read the six-page article to get the full context):

Quote 1:

“Many of these challenges arise from the reality that a church that is calling all women and men to find a home in the Catholic community contains structures and cultures of exclusion that alienate all too many from the church or make their journey in the Catholic faith tremendously burdensome.”

• My comment: That’s a pretty bold statement for a Cardinal to make in the second paragraph of this article. Read on for more…

Quote 2:

“A culture of synodality is the most promising pathway available today to lead us out of this polarization in our church. Such a culture can help to relativize these divisions and ideological prisms by emphasizing the call of God to seek first and foremost the pathway that we are being called to in unity and grace. A synodal culture demands listening, a listening that seeks not to convince but to understand the experiences and values of others that have led them to this moment. A synodal culture of true encounter demands that we see in our sisters and brothers common pilgrims on the journey of life, not opponents. We must move from Babel to Pentecost.”

• It seems so common sense to me to see others as comrades in the journey, but somehow it isn’t obvious for everyone. Or we decide that certain people are not our brothers and sisters but are instead children of the devil, so that we can be justified in casting them out, oppressing them, treating them as enemies….

[Alok on "the grammar of gender"]

I follow Alok Vaid-Menon on Instagram. They are an author, speaker, poet, comedian...and I've been learning so much from them.

Here they are speaking about the grammar of gender:

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A post shared by ALOK (@alokvmenon)

Visit Alok's Instagram page for more great content.

strategically inclusive leadership #1: names that matter, and who is at the margins

[core topic]

This is part of an ongoing series 
on strategically inclusive leadership. 
Read the introduction here.

This idea comes partly from reading the article  “Names That Matter: Exploring the Tensions of Campus LGBTQ Centers and Trans* Inclusion” by Marine & Nicolazzo. The authors studied campus LGBTQ centers to see how much focus they put on each of the letters in their name (L, G, B, T, and Q). In particular, they were interested in knowing if the focus was mostly on lesbian and gay students, and how much transgender people were included and supported. They surveyed the programs, events and services offered to find out.

You can read the article to find out what their findings were, if you want, but the real point is that there are minorities within any minority, and these minorities that can be minoritized, neglected, forgotten or oppressed even by the minority demographic that they are part of. For example, think of the wide range of disabilities that people can have, and how some of these are talked about a lot, some of them we hear about sometimes, and others are never heard about and in fact you might not even know they exist. The key point is not so much whether they are heard about or whether you know about them, but whether the lesser-known ones receive equitable treatment and support and resources. Are they included or not?

Within this strategy / concept, if you are leading a community organization, or an employee resource group, or other groups of minoritized and racialized people, consider: of the people who are part of your demographic or community, who is left out, neglected, excluded?

The second thing to do is to take action. The following quote from Yvette Flunder, a Black lesbian Bishop (from her book Where the Edge Gathers) is enlightening for this part:

"An authentic ethic of inclusion must reach from the center 

to the farthest margin and work its way back."

If you wish to be inclusive, those who are at the center need to reach out to those at the farthest margins and work to bring them to the center. 

strategic inclusion: within my demographic, who is at the margins? Who is the minority within the minority? How can those at the center include, serve, embrace those at the margins?

introduction to "strategically inclusive leadership"

Introducing "strategically inclusive leadership", a term which, if you search for it with quotation marks, brings up about three Google results as of December 2022. Quite unusual considering that most Google searches bring thousands of results.

This has come about as a result of a lot of thinking and learning, and then subsequently being in a leadership position where I've realized that I could either spend my time doing "the usual things" which were done the year before (organize the usual type of meetings, provide input to the newsletter, etc.) or I could be strategic about what the group needed and what would truly make a difference. At some point in the past four months, the ideas that I was trying out and putting in place coalesced into a bigger idea that I'm calling "strategically inclusive leadership."

Here is my working definition of strategically inclusive leadership:

You’ll note that the focus of this definition of strategically inclusive leadership is those who “provide leadership for the flourishing of racialized and minoritized peoples.” This is not about a manager being inclusive of all the members of their work team, nor is this about being a good ally. I imagine that some of the topics we will cover will also be applicable to those who provide leadership in general, and that’s fine, but it’s not the primary focus. 

[love]

 To start off the year, here is an important message from Sir Ian McKellan:

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A post shared by John Bishop (@johnbish100)

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introducing yourself the "triplet" way

 

Here's a tip for introducing yourself - including pronouns - to someone else. 

Use a triplet, or triad, as follows:

1. Name
2. Pronouns
3. Job title, or position on team, etc.

Example: 

Hi, I'm Marcelino, my pronouns are he and they, I'm a stockbroker.

Why the triplet? Two reasons:

1. First, if sharing your pronouns is new(er) to you, putting your pronouns in between two items that you are used to sharing might make it easier.
2. Second, if the other person wants to share, you've modelled a way of sharing. But if they do not wish to share their pronouns, they can still use the outer two parts: name and job title/position. 

Compare the interaction as Jacquelyn and Hassan meet, with the second row using the triplet:

Possibly awkward	Hi, I'm Jacquelyn, my pronouns are she/her.	Oh, hi, I'm Hassan...
Not awkward	Hi, I'm Jacquelyn, my pronouns are she/her, I'm an architect.	Oh, hi, I'm Hassan, I'm the service manager.

Give it a try:

Say:  Hi, my name is __________, my pronouns are __________, I'm a __________. 

Pretty easy, huh!

by Rob Goetze

To learn more, watch my 36 minute video on "A Practical Guide to the New World of Pronouns" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BdtVLgU6OxA&t=6s

how to invite and make space for the sharing of personal pronouns

Individually

There are various steps individuals who are comfortable with sharing their pronouns can do to invite and make space for others to also share their pronouns if they wish. Here are a few examples:

1. Share your pronouns first. This lets others know that sharing of pronouns is okay, and models one way of sharing them.


2. When asking people to introduce themselves (at a meeting, for example), invite them to share pronouns by saying something like “Introduce yourself with your name, your role on this project, your pronouns if you like, and what you hope to accomplish in today’s meeting.”
   Note: extend this invitation equally to everyone. Do not single out the people that you think look gender-diverse.


3. Share your pronouns in your email signature and with your screen name on video conferencing services.


4. When meeting someone new in a work or formal context, use this three-part introduction: Name, Pronouns, Job Position. This models the sharing of pronouns and sets an example for how the other person could share, yet leaves it open for them to just share Name and Job Position. Note that having three parts to your own introduction, means that someone who prefers not to share their pronouns still has two items to share, which is less awkward than only saying their name.


5. If attending an event where name tags are provided, adding your pronouns after your name is an easy way to normalize the sharing of pronouns.

why sharing personal pronouns must be optional

 

Sharing of pronouns is increasing as diversity and inclusion awareness and initiatives grow. It is far more common to see pronouns listed in email signatures or beside attendee names during a video conference. 

More organizations are promoting the use and sharing of pronouns. Some organizations, however, are now requiring employees to share their pronouns. This is problematic and not recommended for a number of reasons:

1. Someone who is not sure about their pronouns can be pushed into making a premature choice simply to comply with the requirement to list their pronouns, and then may face additional scrutiny if they later change their pronouns upon further consideration.


2. Some transgender or non-binary folx might be quite sure about their pronouns but might not be ready to share them. Perhaps they are still getting used to their identity themselves, perhaps it’s not safe to be out at work, perhaps they have other reasons. If they are required to list their pronouns when they do not want to, there are really only two options: lie about their pronouns by listing ones that are not true to them and possibly feeling like they have negated their transition, or tell the truth and out themselves before they are ready to. Neither option is ideal.


3. Someone might not want to share their pronouns as past experience has taught them that it’s not safe to do so.


4. Some people might not be familiar with sharing pronouns, and might not know what to do or be concerned about not doing it wrong, especially if put on the spot in person or at a meeting.


5. Someone might be comfortable sharing their pronouns and identity in some contexts and not in others. For example, someone might be fine sharing with close friends and with colleagues in their work group, but prefer not to do so with acquaintances and strangers. Depending how much their role needs to interact with others outside of the work group, being obliged to share their pronouns might be uncomfortable and awkward for them. For example, a non-binary employee might have asked their friends to use “they/them” to refer to them, but when interacting with the public at work, the employee uses “she/her” as it matches what customers expect and is easier.


6. Some cisgender people do not like pronouns or see the point of them, or do not like trans folx. Requiring these persons to use pronouns can result in a backlash, one that will often be directed back at trans people.

While pronouns sharing should never be required, it should most definitely be allowed and facilitated, especially as it can make a world of difference to people who are trans or gender non conforming, along with being helpful when connecting with people whose names are gender neutral or unfamiliar. 

by Rob Goetze

To learn more, watch my 36 minute video on "A Practical Guide to the New World of Pronouns" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BdtVLgU6OxA&t=6s